I'm no marketing expert. But if I were to guess, it's probably not the best idea to hate the brand and clientele of the product you are marketing. Bud Light VP of Marketing Alissa Heinersceid, who boasts about shattering the glass ceiling as the first woman to lead Bud Light in the brand’s 40-year history, sounds like someone who hates Bud Light almost as much as she hates the people who drink Bud Light. Dylan Mulvaney, as the water that identifies as beer's new spokestrans, starts to make more sense.

Heinerscheid was on something called the "Make Yourself at Home" podcast. It's from March 23rd, so it was a preview of what critics felt had to be an April Fools Day prank gone horribly wrong.

"What does evolve and elevate mean? It means inclusivity."

One second.

Okay, please continue.

"It means shifting the tone. It means having a campaign that’s truly inclusive and feels lighter and brighter and different. And appeals to women and to men. And representation is sort of the heart of revolution."

I see. So to appeal to both women and to men, she hired a man who performs in titface as a woman. Let's check in to see how that is working out for the brand so far.

This part is my favorite. To all you college bros crushing Bud Lights on the weekend and wearing the empty case on your head? YOU'RE THE PROBLEM.

"And we had this hangover. I mean, Bud Light had been kind of a brand of fratty, kind of out-of-touch humor, and it was really important that we had another approach."

What she means are straight white men. Any time too many straight white men like the same thing, it's problematic and wrong. And what Melissa Weinerchild claims is "out-of-touch humor" is everything that has made Bud Light the iconic brand it is. Or was.

If you are a current Bud Light drinker, the people who run Bud Light hate you. Judging from the Dylan Mulvaney video, they also hate people who drink Bud Light while drinking sports. And women. They really, really, really hate women.

The people who run Bud Light find people who don't drink Bud Light, and who also hate current Bud Light drinkers, to be more desirable. Have fun with that.

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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn't writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.

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