Dear Sarah Silverman,

It's Christmas. Yes, Jesus is the reason for the season. He's also a perfect punching bag for cowards like you to wail on while simultaneously holding yourselves out as "edgy." So what better way for a "strong" feminist like you to score "bravery" points this holiday season than by mocking Christians. Ooooh you firebrand, you.

You attempted that by tweeting "Jesus was gender fluid."

Didn't work. You're known for your "bait and switch" comedy. Some key elements are missing here. Namely that there was no bait, nor switch. You said exactly what everyone expected of you. If someone were to ask me to write out Sarah Silverman's faux, edgy tweet for Christmas, I couldn't possibly write something more predictable.

No amount of heart emojis can change that. Though I appreciate your valiant effort.

The only thing offensive to be found in your less than 140 character tripe, is just how phony it was. As I've said time and again, either everything can be mocked or nothing can be mocked. It's not that you mocked Jesus. It's that you phoned in a half-assed troll-job. Also, gender fluid Jesus? You just stole that from the feminist film festival I was kicked out of this year. Watch below. The Grand Rapids Feminist Film Festival is literally more original than you. Let that reverberate for a second.(Watch Leftist Hypocrisy Exposed! Crowder Shows up at Feminist Festival in Underwear)

The painful hypocrisy is what's tough to swallow. And that's only because you want others to abide by your arbitrary speech standards. I remember when you said people need to "get with the times" (read Sarah Silverman Caves to PC Speech Police - "Change with the times...") and told people they shouldn't say "that's gay." Wait... isn't calling Jesus "gender fluid" like calling him "gay"? Or is it only wrong to mock silly things as gay? I'm confused. Damn my intellectual fluidity.

So what is more "offensive"? Deliberately making a comment designed to offend non-violent Christians... or using a colloquialism that was never designed to be offensive?

Naturally, rhetorical. Your only justification is your pure cowardice. Remember my video Jesus vs. Muhammad? I've gotten death threats every day since. Kinda brave, right? At least a little bit. But you, Sarah Silverman, decided to play it safe. Always. You'd much rather mock Jesus, whose followers aren't going to blow you up, than dare go near Muhammad. Don't take my word for it. Here be your words:

“Why didn't I choose to depict Muhammad having sex? The answer is simple: I don’t want to get blown up with explosives. I am afraid of angering Muslims but not afraid of angering Jews and Christians, so I choose to depict the Judeo-Christian God instead. It seems extremely obvious to me, but so many people asked.”

~ "The Bedwetter: Stories of Courage, Redemption, and Pee" by Sarah Silverman, HaperCollins, 2010).

By your own words, you are a coward.

Look, I have no problem with your crappy faux "controversy" tweet. Say whatever you want. In fact, I encourage you to showcase your boring, increasingly politically correct comedy. Transparency is one of the perks of free speech. Plus, the real brave comedians get to call you out on it. Win-win.

You present yourself as "edgy" but openly admit you're too afraid to do the real comedy, the hard work. Taking pot-shots at Jesus isn't brave. Taking shots at Christians, also not brave. Call me when you draw a menstruating Muhammad. With rubber tits.

It's no braver than the new Comedienne du jour, Amy Schumer. The one who displaced you with the same shtick? Yeah, her. To answer your question, no, taking a semi-nude picture while being overweight and unattractive is also not brave. Hopefully you're noticing a pattern here.

Comedians like you who mock Jesus while avoiding Muhammad are simply cowards who lie about your "bravery" merely as a marketing angle. If you're too afraid to mock Muhammad, wade into shallower waters. Mock fat feminists first. Be prepared to bob and weave their chubby fists of fury. Don't worry, they punch themselves out quickly. Then they need a nap and a Nuvaring.

In parting, allow me to offer a prediction here: when you're called out for this hypocrisy, you will immediately retreat and play the "victim woman" card. Kind of like what you did with the Comedy Central roast. Remember?

"Me being old, first of all, at the roast? — completely took me by surprise … Because it’s personal, that is just so woman-based... I feel like it’s a part of, as soon as a woman gets to an age where she has opinions and she’s vital and she’s strong, she’s systematically shamed into hiding under a rock."

So the woman who called Jesus Christ "gender fluid" was complaining about a few gray-hair jokes?

How brave.

SIDENOTE: the reason people made "ageist jokes" has nothing to do with your forty five years of age. It has to do with the fact that you still act like a teenage girl. Your immaturity highlights your actual age. That's why it was funny.

Female comediennes like you want to play with the boys, but can't handle the velocity. You'll no doubt be praised by the progressive left for your comedic bravery. You know why? Because the sad reality is that female comedians are held to a lower standard of comedy. We don't expect you to be funny. We don't expect you to be daring or brave. We entirely expect you to sulk and cry when treated like one of the boys.

We expect you to be like... well, exactly like Sarah Silverman.