Like each new episode of Breaking Bad, the Epstein case just gets worse. Can't say any of us are surprised considering the entire ordeal starts with PEDOPHILE ISLAND. Well now unsealed court documents "allege" Jeffrey Epstein had 12-year-old girls, likely triplets, flown in from France for his birthday. What says "you're appreciated on your special day" quite like three pre-pubescent girls still secretly interested in My Little Ponies? Nothing, I tell you. Nothing. Why send a new tie or heck, a McClaren supercar when you can package up some tweens for a little sex play?

From the UK Daily Mail:

The fresh allegations were made by Epstein accuser Virginia Roberts Giuffre, who claims she was recruited to be a 'sex slave' by the millionaire financier and his girlfriend Ghislane Maxwell when she was 15 in 1999.

Giuffre made the allegations in a civil suit filed by the Miami US attorney's office in 2015. It sought to overturn the sweetheart plea bargain Epstein received in 2008, under which he served just 13 months in prison after pleading guilty to having sex with a minor.

Giuffre believes the three girls were sisters and a present from Epstein's guy pal and frequent guest of PEDOPHILE ISLAND, Jean-Luc Brunel. Not to be confused with the undisputable best Star Trek captain Jean-Luc Picard. You Captain Kirk people can shove it up a borg's cybernetic anal cavity.

'Jeffrey bragged after he met them that they were 12-year-olds and flown over from France because they're really poor over there, and their parents needed the money or whatever the case is and they were absolutely free to stay and flew out,' Giuffre said.

Ah, so another nomination for parents of the year. I wonder how that conversation went...

Parent one: "Honey, we're short on our bills this month. We need some cash and fast."

Parent two: "... hmmm. Let's sell our girls as sex slaves?"

According to Giuffre, she saw these girls with her very own eyes and recalled that Epstein told her, repeatedly, how the girls gave him love rubs and serviced his pecker using nothing but their mouths. 12-year-old girls. After showering Epstein with penis love kisses, they were flown back to France the following day. Wouldn't want to scare these poor kids for life or anything.

How did Epstein score his coven of Twilight Tweens, you ask? Fiar question:

Epstein invested $1million to help launch Brunel's Miami-based modeling firm MC2, in return for a 'supply of girls on tap', the suit claims.

M'kay. Pardon me for echoing a third-wave feminist talking point, but does this sound like a creepy patriarchy to anyone else? Because it does to me. Powerful creepy guys protecting and funding other powerful creepy guys so they can continue being powerful and creepy. Complete with a supposed Madam, Ghislaine Maxwell. I hate to do this, but I can see the patriarchy angle here. Tell me I'm coo-coo.

Jesus's second coming is long overdue.

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