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November 02, 2023
Watch: Tucker Carlson opines on enormous genitals, Zyn, and "erection fraud" with comedian Theo Von
Liberals would have you believe Tucker Carlson's career is in the toilet because he isn't on Fox News anymore. And that Tucker now in his "Podcast Era" is something to mock. There are two things wrong there. The first is that cable news is a dying medium with a dwindling audience. The other is that Tucker is having way too much fun to give a f*ck.
Carlson is having a Bullowrth moment. Only where Warren Beaty's character in the movie appropriated urban culture, Tucker is all in on bro culture. If he still drank, I'm sure there would be video of him shotgunning beers with comedian Theo Von. And not just debating the pros and cons of having a long weiner if you also have a cat. Talk about a cat toy!
(That's Tucker's joke)
I don't get the Zyn thing. I've also only smoked a total of five cigarettes in my life. It's a pouch you can chew on to get your nicotine fix without having to smoke cigarettes or look like a douche vaping. Give it a month or two before those annoying "Truth" commercials come after it. If you can get your nic fix and I don't have to smell every cig you smoked that week when I stand next to you, I say God bless.
That's not to say we don't still get the serious Tucker Carlson. His speech on the rural vs urban divide in America is still a must-watch. But he's now like a one-man variety show that also talks about aliens. Because he can do what he wants and doesn't give a f*ck.
It's hilarious for those of us oldhead enough to remember Tucker's Bow-Tie Era. He was the poster child for uptight Young Republicans who were too busy adjusting the stick up their keister to lighten up. Even though evidence supports that Tucker was always secretly a dudebro.
Middle-aged Tucker Carlson, free from media shackles, is a sight to behold. And speaking as a former young Republican who is looking at fifty in the next year or two, he's, dare I say, inspiring.
Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn't writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.
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