Obama Is NOT a Muslim. The Top 8 Reasons Why...
by Krystal Heath and Steven Crowder
We know, we know. The man's talked about growing up to the call to prayer, what he calls one of the sweetest sounds on earth. He bows to Muslim leaders. He refuses to acknowledge Islamic terrorism as, well... Islamic.
Despite all of these things - and more we won't mention - Barack Obama isn't a Muslim. He couldn't be. He isn't nearly disciplined enough. Thus, we give you, the top 8 reasons Obama is not a Muslim.
1. He drinks. Maybe a little too much actually (according to the doctor who performed his annual physical). Muslims don't drink. Obama's not a Muslim.
2. He swears. Whether it's calling Kanye a jackass, or hanging out with profane Joe "big f***ing deal" Biden, it's clear that he knows his way around the cuss words. Muslims don't swear. Obama's not a Muslim.
3. He did cocaine. Like, lots of cocaine. Muslims don't do drugs. Obama's not a Muslim.
4. He owns a dog. Muslims don't own dogs. Obama's not a Muslim.
5. He eats bacon. On this, I agree with the president. Muslims don't eat pork. Obama's not a Muslim.
6. He wears yellow. Muslims don't wear yellow. Obama's not a Muslim.
7. He is RADICALLY Pro-Choice. Muslims are Pro-Life. Obama's not a Muslim.
8. He lies. All the time. Muslims Don't.... wait what?