Okay I have to admit it: I admire the dedication of the
global warming climate change fanatics. They’re just determined to believe humans are changing the weather of the planet, despite massive amounts of growing evidence to the contrary. Glacier-sized evidence. But the truth is man-made global warming climate change is as real as Caitlyn Jenner’s boobs. Also man-made.
The latest talking point to march to its death? Fossil fuels cause global warming. Because they don’t. In fact, NASA says they’re actually causing temporary global cooling. That sound you hear? Dying dreams. Crashing Priuses.
Major theories about what causes temperatures to rise have been thrown into doubt after NASA found the Earth has cooled in areas of heavy industrialisation where more trees have been lost and more fossil fuel burning takes place.
Environmentalists have long argued the burning of fossil fuels in power stations and for other uses is responsible for global warming and predicted temperature increases because of the high levels of carbon dioxide produced – which causes the global greenhouse effect.
While the findings did not dispute the effects of carbon dioxide on global warming, they found aerosols – also given off by burning fossil fuels – actually cool the local environment, at least temporarily.
I can already hear the cry of the leftist: “BUT THAT IS STILL CLIMATE CHANGE.” Whoa, crazy. Put down the tofu. Step away from the biodegradable knife. What this report demonstrates is how much scientists know about the climate. Actually, reverse that. What this report demonstrates is how much they don’t know about climate science (related FAIL: Scientist That Predicted Ice Caps Would Melt in 2013…Now Claims 2016?). Like how much Caitlyn Jenner doesn’t know about menstrual cramps.
Because for years we heard burning fossil fuels caused global warming. But now they’ve found that, whoops, nope. We meant cooling. Yeah. I make the same mistake all the time. No, I didn’t mean to wear this parka to the beach. I meant to do the opposite of that. Cooling, warming. Who can tell?
This NASA report comes on the heels of this other NASA Report of more ice than ever in their record-keeping history. Which is rather inconvenient if you’re a climate changer who has been saying for decades that the Earth is getting warmer, all the ice is going to melt, and we’re all going to die. Spoiler alert: we are all going to die. Just not drowning in the water from polar ice caps melted by SUVs. I know, I know, disappointing to hear for you climate changers. Good news? You’ll still die.
How will the planet Earth loving hippies react to this good news? Not well. They need the guilt to feel relevant. They don’t have God, they have themselves. They need to believe in the power of their canvas tote bag. This new NASA report puts a wrinkle in it.
In the meantime, buy some of the “Global Warming” products on discount from the video below. We hear they’re on clearance.