We are all this kid. There is not a single person reading this post right now who has not shared this experience. Some of us may have shared this experience longer ago than others, but the experience was still shared. You get your first job. For me, it was McDonalds. It's your first time making money outside of getting an allowance from your parents. It's your first taste of adulthood. You do the math in your head, multiplying how much you are making by how many hours you worked. Two weeks later, you get your first paycheck. You're happy. You're excited. Then unfortunately, you notice less money than you were expecting.

I wish I could tell this kid it gets better. But the next lesson is finding out what your taxes get spent on. It's not bridges and roads, as leftist douchebags smugly say. And wait until the kid starts a lawnmowing business or some other side hustle, and finds out how little he has to make before the IRS gets sent after him.

Then one day, you find yourself self-employed. It's your job to physically take the taxes out of your own paycheck and with each quarterly check you send to the government you find yourself becoming more and more of a libertarian whack job. Eventually, you die. And your family gets taxed for that. Though when my mom passed, my sister and I split a "generous" $2500 check from the government to help with costs. SPOILER: Not even close.

My advice to this kid is to take those warm fuzzies he had before he opened the envelope and hang on them for as long as he can. More importantly, congratulations on the first job! Jokes about taxes aside, there are few better feelings.

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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn't writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.

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