Donald Trump Had Conan, A Very Good Boy, to the White House
We interrupt everything else you were doing to bring you this video of a very good boi, Conan, who was given -- rightfully -- an award, a plaque and his own press conference for being a heroic floof in the takedown of islamic terrorist baddie (or renowned scholar, if you're working at Washington Post) Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi:
Obviously Trump was joking when he said that if the press spoke, Conan would attack them. Conan looks here like he'd rather offer doggy kisses. Of course we know Conan is perfectly capable of a little seek and destroy. Rather than fetching a Nylabone, he'll fetch a neck bone. Watch your back, Jim Acosta. Your voice already sounds like a squeak toy.
I still wouldn't put it past the press, who fact-checked a Daily Wire meme of Trump awarding Conan the medal of honor, to fact-check the Trump joke Conan is trained to kill fake news jabber mouths. Really, I just care about the dog. As the employee at LWC who has the most animals, I feel it's my duty to bring everyone's attention to this puppersnap who needs all the snugs, all the ear-rubs, and all the cookies.
You're now free to resume your Monday.