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Look. We get it. Septuagenarians don't have total control over their bodily functions. Of course, when they blow ass, it's from the privacy of their own assisted living center and not on the floor of the Senate. But as long as staffers don't want to go out and get real jobs outside of Washington DC, they're gonna keep convincing their elderly bosses they still have it. Chuck Schumer, as reported by our old friends at The Blaze, did not still have it yesterday.

It begs the question: who do you think finds Chuck Schumer breaking wind more amusing? President Donald J. Trump? Or social media influencer Rep. AOC, who can now ride the breaking wind to a primary challenge?

My favorite part is that he was bashing Trump at the time of the (allegedly) flatulence. So he had sh*t coming out of both holes.

At least as old and falling apart as Joe Biden was, his farts only came out of his brain. And allegedly, once out of his butt when he was with the Duchess of Cornwall.

Schumer, allegedly, letting one rip has the streets calling for "term limits" because our leaders are old and falling apart before our very eyes. See Graham, Lindsey.

They could announce the McConnell-Feinstein Term Limits Act, and it would have 87% support among Americans. The problem is John Thune would say the parliamentarian ruled he's powerless to do anything about it.

Again, our top story. Chuck Schumer, who is old as f*ck, farted while speaking on the floor of the Senate. Good night, and good luck.

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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn't writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.

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