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For the ContentApril 30, 2024
Watch: Masked man unites America eating an entire jar of cheeseballs in front of hundreds of adoring fans
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You have no doubt followed the news on X-Twitter and come to the conclusion that the wheels are coming off the planet. Especially in New York City, where the Pro-Hamas occupiers are beginning to make the violent 2020 rioters look like the mostly peaceful January 6th protesters. I'm here to tell you that a hero has emerged to unite us all, regardless of race, gender, or... you know, the thing. Cheeseball Man!
Please note: I am going out of my way to do as little research into this story as possible. I need this story to be exactly what it appears to be. We The People need this story to be exactly what it appears to be.
#BREAKING "Eat those balls!" - Hundreds gather in Union Square to watch a man eat an entire jar of cheese balls!
As he ran around the cheering crowd, high fiving with orange cheeseball hands, one fan asked if he'll run for president.
Chesseball man said he'd go home to throw… pic.twitter.com/BEeaj0JlfC
— Oliya Scootercaster 🛴 (@ScooterCasterNY) April 27, 2024
A man had a dream. A calling, really. It was to eat an entire container of cheese balls. But if he did it alone in his apartment, did he really eat an entire container or cheese balls? No. This was a dream to be shared with the world.
Cheeseball Man picked a date and put up fliers throughout the city. You may ask yourself what would make a person want to bring people together by eating an entire jar of cheeseballs in front of them. It's simple, really. To prove that while the United States of all the Americas can decline and even dissolve, the American Spirit will not be defeated.
The US can decline and even dissolve, but the American Spirit will not be defeated pic.twitter.com/ZBbKbnnmao
— ib (@Indian_Bronson) March 30, 2024
The word hero gets thrown around a lot these days. As a commenter on Instagram says, "Who is Cheeseballman? The answer is he's all of us. Every creed, color, and religion. We all have a little bit of cheese in us."
Cheeseball Man sat down with the local press and said he didn't really expect this many people to show up.
"There was a moment that I was definitely going to throw up. And then people said, 'Keep it down,' really loudly. So, I just kept it in."
Hundreds of people gathered in the park for no other reason than they thought this sounded hilarious. Plus, the weather is starting to get nice. They walked away not only learning something about themselves but about all of us. For as much as the haters and losers want to divide everyone, we have more in common with each other than we don't. Cheeseball Man showed us that. He showed us how to love. Dare I say, he showed us how to live.
Thank you, Cheeseball Man.
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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn't writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.
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