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March 16, 2019
Skaters Make Attack Ad Mocking Beto O'Rourke's Skateboard 'Skills'
Beto O'Rourke is the living embodiment of the "how do you do, fellow kids" meme. He's desperate for all of us to know he's totes cool and alternative with his fast food and skateboard. Unfortunately, Beto's board "skills" aren't impressing these skaters.
Get a load of this "attack ad."
Devastating Beto attack ad https://t.co/UHYJ9JTP7P— Jon Millstein (@Jon Millstein) 1552577193.0
"There's a lot of things you can call Beto O'Rourke: Congressman, Texan, charismatic political sensation, but there's one thing we shouldn't call him." Beto O'Rourke is not a good skateboarder. Not even close. The way he handles his board, it's like he's a nervous little kid."
"Anybody who had one cool friend in middle school could do what Beto did that night in that fast food parking lot. It's not impressive."
"Bluntslide Bernie Sanders." Pardon me for just a moment.
I get it how these skaters aren't all too serious with their diss video. Nevertheless, these halfpipe warriors do make some good points. Beta O'Rourke is trying so hard to be a total bruh. I get the impression he's aiming to be a walking '90s caricature. If so, he's only short a pager and a Nirvana album.
It takes more to be a success than rolling a Birdhouse on Independents around the What-A-Burger. Stunts like this aren't gonna cover up for a lack of a solid political message, no matter how cringe-inducing Beto can make them. Pandering and flamboyant arm-flailing aren't gonna substitute for O'Rourke's lack of substance.
We'll see how hip and cool Robert is after his ideas are put to the test. In order to distract from his piss poor ideas, Beto's gonna have to dial up his skate game. Hopefully an ollie or a kickflip will suffice.
Since we're talking O'Rourke: