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December 18, 2023
Watch: Joe Biden attempts feeble excuse why he's stinking up the polls, then a well-timed car crashes into his motorcade
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If you've ever found yourself saying that Joe Biden's poll numbers look like a car wreck, do I have the video for you! Irony struck the streets of Delaware over the weekend. As did a car into Biden's motorcade.
Joe had just finished dinner with his caregiver DOCTOR Jill Biden Ed. D.. It is December 18th, and DOCTOR JILL has yet to be brought up on charges of elder abuse. After a stop by Biden's campaign headquarters, a reporter shouted out a question about his horrible poll numbers. The incumbent loses to all the GOP candidates running to replace him: Ron DeSantis, Biden's predecessor, and a member of his predecessor's cabinet.
REPORTER: Mr. Presdient, why are you losing to [the former president] in the polls?
BIDEN: You're looking at the wrong polls.
Then, before getting the obvious follow-up about what polls are the right polls, SMASH.
Most notable about the video? It's not the perfectly timed car crash. It's not how Joe Biden shattered glass ceilings of unpopularity. It's not even the "who am I and where are my pants" expression. Seriously, this is the face of the man who has access to our nuclear codes.
It's how, amidst an unknown threat, how gingerly the Secret Service needed to handle the President of the United States. If the Secret Service even catches a whiff of danger and the president is younger than old AF, POTUS needs to be rushed into the car and taken far away from there.
Secret Service can't do that with this president. They might break his hip. Any sudden movements and his bones can literally turn to dust. And I'm literally using the word literally in an appropriate fashion. Push too hard, and Biden's right leg would disintegrate.
No one really knows what happened to the driver after the incident. Neither the White House nor the Secret Service will speak on the matter.
Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn't writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.
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