Hey, did you hear the one about Ted Cruz? About how he fought against hurricane relief for Hurricane Sandy, but now wants it for Hurricane Harvey, and derpity derpy derp derp derp? if you haven't, you must not follow many sanctimonious New York/New Jersey politicos. Like Chris Christie, the soon to be former Governor of New Jersey. Though, I'm not sure if he's still in therapy after waking up and discovering Donald Trump left money on the nightstand.

It goes like this. Cruz says he opposed pork in the Sandy relief, because he has this crazy idea that all the money in a disaster relief bill should go to the disaster it's relieving. Chris Christie says there wasn't any pork.

NARRATOR'S VOICE: There was.

Here's how Sen. Cruz responded:

In an interview on Wednesday, Mr. Cruz said he was “quite confident that nobody in Texas gives a flip what Chris Christie has to say. And it seems not many people in New Jersey do either,” he added, appearing to allude to Mr. Christie’s anemic approval ratings.

I'm sorry, I have to.

"Chris should go back to the beach.”

Which off course alludes to Chris Christie shutting down the Government on the 4th of July, yet still using the empty beach himself with his friends. Because really, when your integrity is being questioned, you really want it to come from a guy like Christie. Who seemingly has no integrity left.

Ted Cruz just used the last of Christie's integrity to dilute his cocktail.

Speaking of clowns.

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