Written by Kira Davis
If one more person asks me how I would like it if an Indiana business refused to serve me because I’m black, I’m going to lose what’s left of my mind. I’m serious. I will go crazier than Tom Cruise in a Scientology promotional video. . I am dancing perilously close to the edge of “Donnie Wahlberg marrying Jenny McCarthy even though he KNOWS she’s a gold-digging bloodsucker” crazy. I just need everyone to stop.
It’s not just the question that is driving me nuts. It’s the fact that no one is willing to accept that my answer is what it is – which is “I wouldn’t care!”
You see, that’s not the right answer. The answer is supposed to be, “Oh my gosh! I never thought about it like that. You’ve made such an amazing, salient point and I’ve just been so hung up on my gay-hating Bible rules that I didn’t take the time to think maybe I wouldn’t like it if someone chose not to serve me because of who I am!”
It’s important to note that this Indiana RFRA says absolutely nothing about discrimination and has nothing to do with homosexuals at all. This whole debate is ginned up outrage and navel-gazing. I hate to even participate because it means conceding to discuss a controversy that is non-existent in the first place. That being said, it is what it is and people keep bringing up this dumb question, so I feel I must stoop to address said question.
So, acknowledging of the fact that this discussion is completely unrelated to the text of RFRA, the truth is, I don’t care if there is someone in America who would refuse me service based on my skin color or my religion or my heterosexuality. The truth is I have the luxury of not caringbecause this isn’t 1915; this is 2015 and my ancestors have fought and died to secure my rights to vote, earn, serve and travel freely within the boundaries of this fine nation.
Being a black woman who grew up on a tiny island in northeastern Canada in the 70s and 80s, I have been called a “nigger” more times than I can count. It was hurtful. It took many years to escape the pain of that time in my life and learn to forgive. Also…so what? My feelings were hurt, but what in tarnation did what those people think about me have to do with how I eventually went on to make a lovely, rich life for myself in another country?
Nothing! So people didn’t like me because I was black. Big frikking deal! I still worked. I still voted. I still went to school. I still found friends and family to love. I still dressed myself, paid my bills, drove a car, etc. I’ve worked many different types of jobs over the years. I became a wife, a mother, an actress and eventually a writer. I’ve been able to work hard and enjoy the fruits of my labor. There have been plenty of people in my life who’ve been disgusted with me simply because of my skin color. None of them are here today and not one of them had the power to stand in my way and keep me from claiming what was rightfully mine.
“But Kira, wait! You say it’s not 1915 but if enough businesses refused to serve you because of your sexuality or race aren’t we looking at a repeat of that era?”
No, silly. What you’re talking about is a “slippery slope” and we’ve been reminded over and over again that there is no such thing as a slippery slope. So put that out of your paranoid little heads.
If we somehow wake up in 2 years to find out we’ve magically slipped back into Jim Crow I’ll be the first one to take up arms and march in the streets like my ancestors have.
P.S. – you anti-second amendment folks might want to rethink the whole “right to bear arms” thing just in case those right-wing nutjobs really do get their way and set back civil rights 150 years like you’re always claiming they will. Having the means to oppose an unjust government might come in handy when the government isn’t run by the Golfer-in-Chief anymore. Just a thought for you.
I don’t want to force anyone to serve me or play or work with me if they fundamentally object to me or my lifestyle for whatever bizarre reasons. I certainly don’t want to give those people my money. I’m happy to take my earnings elsewhere, thank you very much. Good luck with that whole racism thing!
Let’s not waste anymore time with these silly hypotheticals. I’m far too reasonable, far too old, and have far too much experience with actual discrimination to spend my time arguing about a situation that has absolutely no appreciable consequences for the success or failure of any educated, hard-working American.
Gay friends, just don’t buy pizza from a pizzeria that doesn’t want to cater your event. Black friends, just don’t buy wedding cakes from a bakery that doesn’t think you should be marrying that white person you fell in love with. Put away your wallet, write a nasty review on Yelp and holler “Bye, Felicia!” as you walk out the door to patronize a more accepting (and probably more successful) enterprise.
If worse comes to worse and you get too annoyed you can always hash out your issues with your Starbucks barista.