Why did the chicken cross the road? Actually he didn’t, because the rooster identifies as a hen. Also, the other side of the road is full of bigots and the chicken is actually an illegal immigrant. This joke is brought to you by reality and BuzzFeed. And transgendered chickens.
The Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals in California on Thursday ordered suspended the deportation of a transgender immigrant woman and told immigration courts within its jurisdiction that it must consider the dangers trans people face when weighing similar cases.
Translation: a man in a dress, who is in this country illegally, will not be deported back to Mexico because Mexicans are mean toward men who think they’re women. Is that transphobia or sexism? Hard to keep track.
Does the Ninth Circuit care about border security and what illegal immigrants are doing to American citizens? Nah. The Ninth Circuit cares about a dude in a ball gown. He’s the new Cinderella Man. They don’t want him to get made fun of or beat up by the Mexicans that everyone accused Trump of calling horrible people. No, Señor Avendano-Hernandez gets to stay here and enjoy the fabulous Labor Day sales. Fashion tip: no tight white dresses. Not because you shouldn’t wear white after labor day, but the penis.
Avendano-Hernandez was one of three transgender immigrant Mexican women seeking protection from deportation in cases before the Ninth Circuit that attorneys and advocates had hoped would set a precedent for how immigration courts distinguish between gender identity and sexual orientation.
Oh, one more tiny detail. Faux-Señorita Hernandez is a convicted felon.
Edin Carey Avendano-Hernandez was born male in Mexico, and claims to have been raped by his brothers and suffered other torments. In 2000, he illegally entered the U.S. and took up residence in Fresno, California. Avendano-Hernandez also started taking female hormones and began living openly as a woman in 2005. In 2006, he committed two separate drunk driving offenses, the second of which injured two people and resulted in a felony conviction. After serving a year in jail, he was deported back to Mexico in 2007.
This is progress, people. Kim Davis, who’s citing her first amendment constitutional right to practice her religion, she goes to jail for not giving marriage licenses. But this right here, this is what matters most. If someone could just pass Kim Davis a message (maybe in a gay wedding cake?) that maybe she should claim she’s a man, she’d have better luck with the law. Hey Kim, maybe just reverse your names while you’re at it. Be Davis Kim, see if you can get a little trans-racial thing going too.