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March 22, 2019
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Bitched About FoxNews Messing Up Her Name. She Gets Wrecked.
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. We like to call her Alexandria Nina Pinta Santa Maria Ocasio-Cortez. We also like to call her socialist barbie, bug-eye baby, and my personal favorite, "moron." I know it's simple, but I like to stay with the classics. FoxNews, however, has apparently been referring to her royal specialness, the Princess AOC, as "Cortez." This has raised every single precious goosebump on Alexandria's thin skin. Check this out:
By the way: Fox News likes to say my name (incorrectly) as “Cortez,” which I can only imagine is bc that sounds mor… https://t.co/i8aNvh6V29— Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (@Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez) 1553129467.0
Welcome to the club, pickled pupils. People flub your name. I have to tell people my last name is pronounced "KER-choff." Some people say "KEER-choff" others "KEER-koff." An algebra teacher told me my freshman year "well in Germany it's pronounced 'keer-HOVE'" or something, to which I replied "But we're not in Germany." Point is, for some 30 years, I've been correcting people on how to say my last name. It's never been a big deal. It's just part of being a human being. People flubbing your last name has nothing to do with racism, sexism, bigotry, homophobia, or any other ism. To think someone getting your name wrong is anything more than getting your name wrong could signify psychosis.
So, naturally, Twitter had some fun.
Girl, you can chill. It’s cause you have three names. Welcome to the club. People call me Mary Beth, Elizabeth, Bet… https://t.co/QB6HjdPsCj— Allie Beth Stuckey (@Allie Beth Stuckey) 1553185605.0
I like that Allie Beth also talks down to AOC, best to get down to AOC's comprehension level. Allie Beth and I could probably be friends.
Then came Amanda for a one two punch. First:
Omg r u ok? https://t.co/cCRqAD8ZMG— Amanda (@Amanda) 1553175546.0
I SWEAR TO GOODNESS IF ONE OF YOU MOTHERF***ERS MISPRONOUNCES MY SIMPLE SICILIAN LAST NAME ONE MORE TIME— Amanda (@Amanda) 1553176060.0
I've heard Amanda's name pronounced a couple of times. I've spoken with Amanda just once I think. I do hope I've got her name right, I don't want her to cut me. Her being Sicilian and all.
Then this guy came in with a clever meme.
I AM OFFENDED AS A BLONDE WOMAN WITH A GERMAN LAST NAME.
Not to be outdone by a basic classic:
Late to the party, me, with this last entry:
Did you ever take that "which fictional character are you" test? Was your result Veruca Salt? https://t.co/c8J1tegftE— Courtney Kirchoff (@Courtney Kirchoff) 1553225757.0
Toughen up, buttercup. Some people got your name wrong. It's not like they completely wrecked your entire argument...