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Woman Assaults Parents for Denying Her a Trip to Outback Steakhouse

Corey Stallings
January 06, 2019

Allow me to introduce you to the mayor of Crazytown. This young lady was hellbent on getting herself some grub from the always tasty Outback Steakhouse. When her parents wouldn't hook her up with a little of the ol' shrimp on the barbie, things got violent.

I kid you not:

A South Florida woman upset that her parents refused to take her to Outback Steakhouse was arrested after she attacked the couple Wednesday night, deputies said.

According to the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office, Deana Seltzer, 28, asked her mother to go to the popular chain restaurant in Lake Worth and was told no. Seltzer then became enraged and began punching her mother in the chest and arms, an arrest report said.

Seltzer's father suffered multiple scratches to his face and body when he attempted to intervene.

Seltzer also charged at her father with a 12-inch decorative knife that had been hanging on the wall, chasing him and screaming, "I'm going to (expletive) kill you."

Look, I enjoy Outback's blooming onion as much as the next guy. Though, I'm not willing to have charges filed against me when I can't get some. I'm sure if this young lady would have just been patient, I'm sure mom and pop would have eventually obliged and taken her on a trip to flavortown.

I wish I could say I this was surprising. Though, with all the social justice nutbars flipping out every time they don't get their way, this doesn't come as much of a shocker.

All jokes aside, there's obviously some deep-seated mental issues at play here. Especially if the withholding of some Gold Coast Shrimp is enough to drive this lass to homicidal rage. I hope she gets all the help she can get. Hopefully, once she leaves the institution with some medication, she and her folks can bury the hatchet "decorative knife" over some surf n' turf.

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