Ted Cruz Just Force Choked Mark Hamill on Net Neutrality
Everyone have an enjoyable weekend of watching, debating, and overanalyzing The Last Jedi? Good. It feels nice to have a shared experience that unites us rather than divides us. Now get back to work. Because apparently Mark Hamill was the most recent celebrity who Democrats sent net neutrality talking points to.
Cute video Ajit "Aren't I Precious?" Pai 🤮-but you are profoundly unworthy 2 wield a lightsaber-A Jedi acts selfles… https://t.co/NqJpu3wTrZ— Mark Hamill (@Mark Hamill) 1513421628.0
Way to have a sense of humor, Jar Jar. Not that celebrities tweeting ignorant things about net neutrality is newsy. It's the most on trend thing in Hollywood.
Thanksfully the social media is strong in Senator Ted Cruz. As we've seen (see Ted Cruz Perfectly Destroys Liberal Deadspin in Epic Twitter Exchange and Ted Cruz Owns the New York Times on Charlottesville With Single Tweet…). He responded in the nerdiest way possible.
.@HammillHimself Luke, I know Hollywood can be confusing, but it was Vader who supported govt power over everything… https://t.co/3nE5x55Icn— Ted Cruz (@Ted Cruz) 1513535146.0
Cruz originally spelled Hamill's handle wrong, but it was still all in good fun.
However when he's not playing Luke Skywalker or the voice of the Joker, Mark Hamill is like most Hollywood celebrities. A partisan douchecanoe in real life.
Thanks for smarm-spaining it to me @tedcruz I know politics can be confusing, but you'd have more credibility if yo… https://t.co/WEeb4fAYJm— Mark Hamill (@Mark Hamill) 1513538541.0
Oh, young Padawan. Which is actually Jedi for "you big dummy."
But in Hamill's trying to strike Ted Cruz down, the Senator just grew more powerful than he could possibly imagine.
Yes, that's it. So sorry to misspell your name. Respond not with facts, but with anger. Who was it that said, "Fear… https://t.co/HcgV4xtDuk— Ted Cruz (@Ted Cruz) 1513548313.0
(2/2) Rather than insults, try civil discussion of facts. Fact 1: until 2015, the FCC had NO authority over Interne… https://t.co/BeGnqcAXHM— Ted Cruz (@Ted Cruz) 1513548704.0
Basically, Ted Cruz just treated Mark Hamill like he posted Last Jedi spoilers.
Exit question: How was Ted Cruz able to do this? And actually, how are any of you even reading this post? I thought the internet was going to shut down after the net neutrality vote...