Ted Cruz fired his flame thrower at Beto O'Rourke for a blinding spectacular display of sass. Right off, you will not be made smarter, learn anything, or grow as a person from this story. So don't accuse me of selling this as more than it is. The following is purely for your entertainment only. Think of it as a fat-filled s'more: zero nutritional value, delicious fun.

...wait for it.

Damn that was good.

If you don't remember, Beto challenged Ted for the senate seat. And lost.

Whether that was Cruz, a Cruz minion, Heidi, or the spirit of the Zodiac killer, who cares. That was one sick burn. I recommend Beto O'Rourke put some ice on it. After, and only after, he heads to Home Depot to eat dirt. Bags and bags of the finest, softest, stinkiest compost of which he can dunk he's little head. Snort it like it's coke, Beto. If you're confused by the dirt-eating reference: Beto O'Rourke Ate Dirt After Losing to Ted Cruz. Voluntarily. Dirt. He Ate It.

Keep the sass flowing, Ted. I may not approve of the beard. But I do approve of the burns.

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