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February 20, 2018
Snoop Dogg's Former Bodyguard, Tyrus: Protect Our Schools with Veterans
NOTE: This was written after the Parkland shooting. But since here we are again, it remains good advice someone should listen to.
While the left harps on "MOAR GUN CONTROL" as an answer to Parkland (and all) school shootings (see CNN Writer Wants to Pass Gun Control Laws. By Giving Voting Rights to 16-Year-Olds. and Leftists Viciously Attack Parkland Victim's Father Over His Trump T-Shirt), sane people are more interested in solving the problem. Like Tyrus, a pro-wrestler, former bodyguard for the D-O-Double-Gizzle, and frequent guest on Gutfeld.
Tyrus suggests a TSA for schools. And the former Funkasaurus knows just who to hire.
"4.3 unemployment for returning veterans in this country. That's 430,000 trained men who have eyes and ears. We need to have them at the schools. TSA needs to be at the schools. One way in. One way out. There's not one person in this building who not be ok with upping theirs taxes $25. I would even take money away from other things. Because we need to get with it. Because now it's guys with guns. Ten years from now it's going to be a guy with a drone."
From a branding standpoint, I wouldn't call it TSA for schools. That implies the Blue Gloves of Freedom grabbing someone's junk on the way to AP Biology. Or getting too handsy when the wiring in your bra sets off metal detectors. "Ma'am, I'm going to need to cup your breasts for America." Hello lawsuits.
But according to Google, there are less than 38,000 schools in the United States. How many of them have at least one unemployed veteran living near them? No, we wouldn't have to raise taxes to levels which boggle small minds. How many of these schools have a second or third assistant superintendent making a six-figure salary? Show of hands, who knows what an "assistant superintendent" actually does. Uh huh. A therapist for over-worked hamsters makes more sense.
Cut all the patronage bovine caca in schools. Replace the jobs with people who actually protect our kids. From real dangers. Not signs written in chalk.
It's at least the start of a good idea. Far better than "guns look super mean."
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