Not sure when getting angry over celebrity salaries became the "woke" thing to do, but I get to use Gal Gadot and Henry Cavill gifs throughout this post. There are worse ways to spend an hour.

Liberal bloggers using nothing but Google and their raging hate fingers, thought they learned Gal Gadot was paid $300k for her starring role in Wonder Woman. Whereas Henry Cavill was paid $14M for his starring role in Man of Steel. Well, all of that is complete bullhockey. But when have facts ever stopped the PMS Rage from setting sail across the river Red Flow.

To the shit-posting ninnies who couldn't bother to fact check, the very idea a female new-coming star was paid less than a male new coming star meant the patriarchy was keeping women down. Even the super hot women. Raising up white men to rule the world with their laser-shooting eyes and perfect hair regardless of flight speed or altitude.

Damn perfect hair all the time. Proof of a patriarchy.

Fact-checkers were quick to denounce the OMG a girl was paid LESS than a BOY for a SIMILAR movie! crowd. Even BuzzFeed. But ultimately, to these she-men and she-women, once the specter of the gender gap myth was raised, feministic midgets squealed about unfairness. And they'll squeal until Lex Luther and Batman hug it out.

Here's what allegedly got it started:

That's the deleted tweet. From noted liberal loony bin, Lauren Duca. One wonders if she (not so secretly) hoped she was right. Therefore raising all her pitchforks at DC studio mucky-mucks and white men everywhere.

Burn all the white men.

But twas not so. In hours, the tweet was proven false by people who actually know things.

Warner Bros. and representatives for Cavill and Gadot did not respond to EW’s call for comment, but a source familiar with the contracts disputes widespread claims that Cavill’s salary (cited as being near $14 million) was significantly higher than Gadot’s (pegged at $300,000). “All first-time actors and actresses are paid an appropriate fee at the beginning,” the source tells EW, “which is then sweetened with backend participation and renegotiation as the franchise progresses.”

Apparently, Gal Gadot was paid "at least" as much as Henry Cavill, and standard pay based on newcomers to starring role movie franchises. Not only should feministic cat hair-knitters calm themselves, but rejoice. EQUALITY! Wonder Woman got paid like Superman!

Alas, feminists are so devoted to the idea they're victims of a mythical patriarchy, they have to ignore this little tidbit about Amy Adams being paid MORE than Henry Cavill in Man of Steel. If you haven't seen it, Amy Adams is the co-star. Not the star. But guess what? She has vastly more seniority in the film industry, ergo she was paid more than the chap in the title role.

Amy Adams actually made more than Cavill for her role in Man of Steel. “Is Lois Lane a bigger part of Superman’s film than Superman?” is the wrong question to ask, since obviously, Adams should be headlining a Lois Lane movie. But Adams was already established by then as a movie star, a frequent Oscar nominee, and an international treasure.

That should've proven the gender pay gap myth is crap. But in the VERY SAME article, the closing paragraph has to go back to OMG, WOMEN GET SHAFTED narrative:

This is not to toss aside the very real and necessary outrage over the gender gap in Hollywood income. The first Superman film came out in the ’70s, and the first Batman film came out in the ’80s, and Wonder Woman only got her first theatrically-released feature film this year, after appearing in a film about Batman and Superman, two years after even Ant-Man. But it’s important to be outraged about the right things. And to celebrate the money Gal Gadot will soon receive for Wonder Woman 2, a paycheck that will take her one step closer to her long-deserved island continent made of moon diamonds.

Also, Batman and Superman are the MOST FAMOUS SUPERHEROES! Which is why they were made first. Look it. I'm using all caps. Dang it. See what these feminists do to me?

Here's the money shot: I spent over 600 words writing about a story that wasn't a story. There is no gender pay gap. Gal Gadot didn't get shafted by patriarchal studio heads. Henry Cavill didn't dance his way into fat stacks based solely on his Y chromosome. But liberals are so devoted to this myth, they trumped up a controversy around absolutely nothing. And that should tell you something.

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