The gods are among us. Or rather, a fat rolly man with cheeks of chipmunks with a toy army and his own media outlets (see North Korea Now Bans Thank You Notes. Yes, Really… and Just in Time for Christmas! Here’s How North Korea is Banning Joy and Merriment…). Nonetheless, Kim Jong Un’s latest antics in convincing North Koreans he is a god have truly surpassed all other efforts.
The god-king dictator can now control the weather. Hopefully he has more control over that than his temper.
After releasing images this weekend of a smiling Kim on top of Mount Paektu, an active volcano on the China and North Korea border, the nation’s state media said the “peerlessly illustrious commander” can control “the nature.”
When Kim “ascended” to the top of the 9,000-foot mountain through thick snow wearing his signature double-breasted winter coat and black leather shoes, a blizzard gave way to “fine weather unprecedented.”
“Imposingly standing on Janggun Peak, the respected Supreme Leader gave a familiar look for a while at the dizzy cliffs and the sea of trees, recalling the emotion-charged days when he realized the great historic cause of completing the state nuclear force without yielding even a moment and with the indomitable faith and will of Paektu.”
Imagine calling oneself the “Supreme Leader.” It’s like giving birth to a giant kidney stone, calling it “the new diamond” and then demanding all worship you as the diamond maker. Complete idiocy. But anything goes in North Korea when it comes to their dearest leader. All hail the fat, little bridge troll.
According to his official biography, Kim Jong II also claimed to be a master golfer who shot 11 holes-in-one in his very first game. At various times North Korean state media has reported that his son started driving at age 3 and is responsible for various medical breakthroughs in the treatment of cancer, Ebola and other serious illnesses.
I bet this biography must be read by all of North Korea’s school children. Indoctrination starts young. This must be who leftists took tips from when it comes to indoctrinating kids (see PROGRESS: California Public Schools Forced to Teach 2nd Graders About LGBT).
Come to think of it, North Korea just seems to be a giant analogy for leftist ideals in their full and unabashed glory. Subverting reality for the whims of insecure crazies. We want this metaphor to end at once. Much like the sudden halt of Kim Jong’s unsettling hairline.