Dunkin Donuts doesn’t want to be woke. Save that crap for Starbucks (see So Starbucks. How Did All that Leftist Virtue Signaling Work Out for You? and WATCH: “Footage” of What Starbucks’ Sensitivity Training Looks Like). So sayeth VP of brand stewardship Drayton Martin on a lunch panel at the 2019 meeting International Trademark Association.
"we are not starbucks, we aren't political– we aren't gonna put stuff on our cups to start conversations. we don't want to engage you in political conversation, we want to get you in & out of our store in seconds. it's donuts & ice cream– just be happy."#dunkin #inta2019
— alexandra j. roberts (@lexlanham) May 20, 2019
Dunkin isn't Starbucks, they don't want to start a conversation on their cups. They want you in and out in a minute and twenty seconds. Have conversations with your friends; Dunkin isn't your friend. (This is such a New England attitude, I love it.) #INTA2019
— Stacey Lantagne (@StaceyLantagne) May 20, 2019
Right? Thank you Dunkin! Where the coffee is better, and the person behind the counter isn’t too busy tweeting about Pete Buttgig that they get my name wrong. Because Dunkin’ doesn’t care what your name is. They just want to sell you coffee. Maybe a couple of donuts and a kolache. Isn’t that the entire point of an establishment that sells food and coffee?
The only problem I’ve had at a Dunkin Donuts was last week when they were blasting Meat Loaf at six o’clock in the morning. Who still listens to Meat Loaf?
Will the VP of brand stewardship stand his ground? The Intersectional Legion of Doom is gathering as we speak to discuss their next move. A company NOT engaging in politics is verboten. First, it’s Dunkin’. Next thing you know, it’s Tim Horton’s ignoring the Green New Deal in favor of a new green tea donut. Then Krispy Kreme will get involved by not getting involved.
Before you know it, companies across the United States of all the Americas will think they can just sell you things. And NOT have the same political opinion as you. If businesses keep this up, we might actually be happier. IT MUST END.