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January 03, 2020
CNN Reports Trump Ate Ice Cream During Soleimani Air Strike, But What Kind?
In what seems like a petty attempt from CNN to paint Trump as a cartoon, they accidentally made him that much more likable with a tale of ice cream and terrorists who go boom. Yes, during the attack against Iranian baddie Qassem Soleimani, Donald Trump enjoyed an all-American meal of meatloaf, cake and ice cream. Cue James Earl Jones saying "This is CNN."
President Trump dined on ice cream as news of the airstrike broke https://t.co/iP5fbnSfDH https://t.co/SmrqI6zN0Y— CNN Politics (@CNN Politics) 1578077402.0
As news broke that the US struck and killed Qasem Soleimani, President Trump was dining at his Mar-a-Lago club, surrounded by old friends and others like House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy.
As meatloaf and ice cream were served, the Pentagon confirmed that the US was behind the strikes, the only statement from the administration throughout the night.
Aside from how are we all spelling this terrorist's name, there are more important questions. Was the ice cream served with the loaf? As in along side it? I know Trump got in trouble for the steak and ketchup scandal, so I'm just wondering if the ice cream came with the meatloaf like some kind of dairy au jus. Is like a salty-sweet thing, or nah?
Secondly, what flavor of ice cream? I'm just wondering what pairs well with air striking a terrorist. For some reason cookie dough comes to mind. If not some kind of Ben & Jerry's flavorful pun. Chocolate Bombs Away? Caramel Drone-Nuts Delight? Inshallah 'n Cream? I admit to a little reaching on the last one.
Better still, while the air strike was going down, Trump hosted the Chinese President Xi Jinping. Here's Trump's very trumpish account:
"I said, Mr. President, let me explain something to you — this was during dessert,” Trump said at the time. “We’ve just fired 59 missiles, all of which hit, by the way, unbelievable, from, you know, hundreds of miles away, all of which hit, amazing. Brilliant. It’s so incredible. It’s brilliant. It’s genius.”
According to Trump in this CNN article, President Xi was silent as he ate the most beautiful piece of chocolate cake you've ever seen. But I'm also guessing President Xi may have been feeling a little uncomfortable as Trump so nonchalantly mentioned he was bombing the ho lee took out of Solemiani.
Seriously how are we spelling this guys name? CNN has it with an "o" but other places with a "u"? All I want is confirmation of which is the correct spelling and do we have photos of Trump eating ice cream while however its spelled was being dispatched? Also, how many scoops? If we know how many missiles, why don't we have an accurate scoop count? C'mon, CNN #DoYourJob.
It doesn't matter what Trump was doing or not doing at the time of the strike. CNN wouldn't be pleased with it. Had Trump sat in silence with prayer beads, CNN would call him callous. So why not nom on some slow churned scrumptiousness?